Now according to most self help books, we should focus on gratitude and abundance of what we have. Alongside we should also assume we have the things we desire and constantly do affirmations to have them in real life.
Now if you’ve ever practiced this, I’m sure you know that when we are being grateful about what we have we are giving our subconscious mind / psyche a bit of relief and by keeping ourselves busy by thinking about our desire we eventually start to work for it.
But from my experience, it’s not always true. I believe that always assuming that you have the things you want can lead to you being a little too relaxed about your desire making you not work just as hard.
So…then, what to do?
Well, I believe that we should spend a ton of time on ourselves and exclude out the whole world, including your family. But when you are having your “me” time then do not touch your phone or anything that distracts you. In this me time, you should think about yourself and what change do you want in yourself. This need not be done in the form of meditation, you can very well do this while walking, singing, playing. The sole purpose is that you need to spend time with yourself a little more often and think about yourself.
What will this do?
This will make you think about all your assets and short comings and you’ll start to understand yourself better. If you do this “me time” for a longer period then you’ll also come up with amazing solutions to tackle your problems and short comings. You’ll start thinking of innovative ideas to actually solve the problem than, as recommended by self help books, just thinking that the problem is solved.
Now this might seem a long process and I agree it is a long one but you can always make it shorter by applying the famous “affirmations rule”. But focus on affirmations the least and give it a maximum of 10 minutes. This way you can speed up the process to self improvement and self empowerment whilst satisfying your psyche by doing affirmations.
This does has a limitation though.
Having a lot of “me time” can make you a loner and you might feel isolated. You don’t have to force yourself to shut up. If you’re blubbering mess then no need to change yourself. Just make sure to spend some amount of time to yourself for having a peace of mind and being contented.
Now people often find their happiness in the time they spend thinking about themselves, so it’s natural to not pay much attention to the world. But the thing is, by spending too much time by yourself, you can become a very socially awkward person. As good as it feels to be yourself and in your own little world, you still have a life to live and you still have a society to face. This society wouldn’t hesitate one single bit to push you out or neglect you if you completely stop socializing.
So make sure to watch the time you spend on yourself.